Pimpin Rides

Today we present yall wit some of the most bangin Pimp Rides the world has to offer you. Cha Ching! These babies will cost you more than what ur worth, so just dream on fella, dream on... I speak for myself as well... Movin on! Below are some the meanest rides u can neva buy! So just shut up, watch and appreciate! Ya Heard! Here our number one baby... They call her the next batmobile... I call her my Beautiful Biatch! Take a look at her interior... Movin on! Now if u wanna pimp like em old cheesy pimps... this ir your ride If yall wanna tune into your classic pimp side, hook up wit dis ride Now lets take a look of some biatchin interiors... Yall pimps who wanna get all high tech, this car is the shiat... Aight Yall das enough for your virgan eyes... I got to go sweat my pimp style on the lovely ciber hoe miss mora... that biatch is yellin my name fo more! Pimps up! Hoes Down!

Pimpin for Dummies...

Top 5 Ways to Get a Hot Girl From the Club to your Apartment

1.Tell her that while playing __________ (insert favorite sport here) in college, you injured your leg in the playoffs and haven’t been the same since. Tell her that it’s tiring and painful to stand at the bar all night and that you need to sit at home and ice it, but you don’t want to leave her since she is so intriguing and, well, “different than the other girls.” Remember to mention that you still won that game you got hurt in and that you made it to the championships-girls don’t listen to sports talk until they hear “winner” or “championship” and then you can paint their face whatever color you want, or with whatever you want… 2. Tell her you live above a 24 hour bagel shop, and the bagels are unbelievable. The only reason why some girls go home date-less at the end of a night drinking is to have an affair with a bagel…why not give her the threesome she has always wanted? Throw in that the store owner is a good friend and gives you a great discount, girls love a well-connected guy, especially when warm dough is involved. For those Jewish girls, tell her it’s a kosher bagel place, for dieters, a carb-free bagel place (just shake your head yes when she give you a doubtful look, if she has had a few drinks she will think anything is possible). 3. Tell her you just moved to a GIGANTIC, NEW apartment and need decorating tips, and since she is so “stylish and savvy” she can help you and give you advice. Emphasize the size and how luxurious it is, and explain that Colin Farrell, or some other hot bachelor used to live there, it will make her think of casual sex with a hot man with an accent and she will be five steps closer to the valet. Little does she know that it’s not the apartment space that needs to be filled… 4. Tell her you just want to cuddle, hold her, spoon. Tell her it’s not about hooking up; you just want to “feel close to someone tonight” and that she can trust you. Once you have her in your bed, spooning can become forking by a few light kisses to the neck, a hand through her hair, and a “god, you are so beautiful” (don’t forget the pause after god, key to feigned sincerity). Just as “watching a movie” really means “dry humping,” “just wanting to hold you” translates to “just wanting to hold it.” 5. Tell her you have on-demand and have a ton of HBO series…she will automatically think “Sex and the City,” and be game for a few re-runs. Even if you don’t have it, while “searching” for her show of choice, start a porno “by accident.” Girls like to say they don’t watch it or like it, but really, they just want someone else to push the play button so they can continue their guiltless life of porn-induced masturbation and sex, and still be considered just another girl who watches “Sex and the City” and not the girl who has sex with the city. **Bonus Item** "Never Tell her..." Never tell her that you have to go home to feed your dog, cat or pet of choice. If you don’t have a pet at all, this could be the worst line for you to use, considering the ladies just may see through your intricate plot when they come to your place to find not quite the bone they expected to find. If you do have a pet, telling them at the club at 3am that you still haven’t fed your pet that day, they might consider you irresponsible and well, no girl wants a guy who can’t handle the p*ssy." [Yall wanabees can thank Pimpwiz.com for this article]

Pimp Accordingly...

As corporate mo fo's, my side kick Dr.P and I worked on stylin and mackin our latest business idea which is held under confidential conditions... It shall be revealed in due time. After hard work, we macked up into our bling bling pimp wear and headed towards Pimp Valley. Pimp Valley is filled of wonders and hot arss biatches... And you can even find pimp supplies to increase your pimp vibe. For all uz that aint found the yellow brick road to Pimp Valley, I'll hit you up wit some pics, yall can thank www.phatpimpclothing.com for these pics... Before pimpin yall can hook yourself with these tastey pimp meals that are sure to bring out the best pimp inside you. Don't forget to wash it all down wit some Pimpa - Cola. Ya heard! Movin on... After gettin our Pimpin snacks we decided to venture on a mission. A mission only pro pimps as ourselved could go on... We work a day shift at a company that makes adult sites for all you pimps that either can't get real hoes or just want to decorate your wallpaper a bit. There are some files wit hundred of mad arss girls on these comps so we decided to hook yall up wit these pics and provide you wit our comments...

Today: THE PIMPIN MISSION - PIMP AT YOUR OWN RISK!

Aight yall I present to you our companies biatches, remember don't hurt urselves... Title:"Bed Time Story" 2 THUMBS UP Mr.White Chocolates Comments: This biatch is lookin at me like she want me to slap her silly. This is one fine demonstration of hot latina women! Slap that biatch alll night! Dr.P's Comments: This hoe knows what she got! Yeah I would spank her ass all night long!. Just to show her some pimpin' loooove. Title: "Help me un-button my dress?" 1 THUMB UP - 1 THUMB DOWN Mr.White Chocolates Comments: I am all about natural lovin, if the biatch aint got it, she aint got me. This hoe just got some nice package to squeeze but other than that I dont love this hoe! Dr.P's Comments: Nice Rack Lady! Although Mr P prefer them natural he wouldn't mind playing with those nice boobs.AThat nasty-sweet-innocent-milf-loof would make great addiiton to my mackin' collection! Title: "Its gettin hot in herr" 2 THUMBS UP Mr.White Chocolates Comments: She got the all american white girl vibe goin on, but that just dont pimp my style, howeva that fine arss while make this hoe pass on my list and on my lap. Dr.P's Comments: This beatch showd up yesterday by my pool. I gotta say she is delicious ! I'd love to squeeze that pair of cheeks one more time! Title: "Squeaky Clean" 2 THUMBS UP Mr.White Chocolates Comments: DAMN! Need I say more? This biatch is all mine, I'm out and over to the tub of luv... Dr.P's Comments: this is the highly acclaimed piece titled "Nipples waiting for a tongue" she even has roses by them. This girl is all clean ready for some hot action! Title: "So much work so LITTLE time" 2 THUMBS DOWN Mr.White Chocolates Comments: Even though I got some asian blood, I just dig them movies. This asian hoe got nutin to offer, where is she? She blends in to much with the walls...flat walls... Dr.P's Comments: Oh no! a plain chest hoe!! Maybe she doesn't have a butt also. too bad I love Asian women by te dozen. shee better keep studying how to pump up those tits! Title: "Smile for my birdie!" 2 THUMBS UP Mr.White Chocolates Comments: This biatch is posin for my luv camera. Thats right, and lata I'll take her down to the luv crib, where I'll put her in her Birthday Suite! Dr.P's Comments: that's Sydney...she's got too much clothes put on, but to hell with it i'd still sho her my great pimp stick! yeah, yeah! Is it me or her face is of a different color? Title: "DUMP LOAD!" 2 THUMBS DOWN Mr.White Chocolates Comments: This hoe is neva gettin some lovin from anyone with a healthy concience. She looks like a nasa monkey experiment gone wrong! The question is: is it really a women? How can the almighty create such beasts! Dr.P's Comments: make way Chitah is about to poo. Man it smells horrible, someone please tell Henry to tak off the wig and be a man again..Damn...

Aight Pimps thas enough for today, yall can hit me up wit ur comments as well. Share the love pimps! Tommorrow I'll hook yall pimps up wit some tips on pimpin.

Peace Pimps Up! Hoes down!

Surfin For Biatches

Sometimes while we'z all chillin in the pimp playground down here in South America, we like to surf a bit on the web and rate em biatches that pose at their own will on the web... Some hoes are mad hot while others still gotta go through more surgeries... Below are the fine arss biatches and them ugly ducklings too... We gotz these pic's thank to Dr.P's mack surfin skills and of course myself... Title:"Mad Arsss"... 2 THUMBS DOWN Mr.White Chocolate's Opinion: perfect view of entrance... but no cushin for a safe landin... Dr.P's comments: Thaat beatch's ass looks flat to me! No good for pumpin' Title: "Broadway" - 2 THUMBS UP Mr.White Chocolate comment: Line em up! These girls got that home feelin, girl next door kinda arss... Dr.P's comments: What a nice selection! I wished the pic was in better quality to check those hoe's nice butts. Title: "What a nice smile..." - 2 THUMBS UP Mr.White Chocolate's comments: Yall pimps know u aint lookin at that innocent smile... Das right all yall know she got the package goin on, this latina is a hot motha fo! And her necklace gives u the key to...to what eva u fools want! Dr.P's comments: She looks like a hot mamma, It's time to play Poke-ur-mom! Title: "Dorthy grows up" Mr.White Chocolate's Comments: Damn! I wanna play indians and cowboys wit dis hoe! She gotz a find line and package, perfect for a pimp biatch Dr.P's Comments: yeehaw! It's time to play some rodeo in the barn. Take off your clothes bitch! Title: "Hang Over" - 2 THUMBS UP Mr.White Chocolate Comments: Das right, this girl had some serious "hang over" look like she need herself to tuck those babies back into bed...or take em all out of the sack... why cover em biggy's, I say they need some fresh air...let em out! Dr.P's comments: Crackhead Monica's Nipples are slippin' out of her dress...hmm i like em that way. fo' shizzle! Title: "Car Wash" - 2 THUMBS UP Mr.White Chocolate Comments: Fools! This biatch is waitin for me to spash some water on her and slap her silly. Das right, this pic make u wanna take her on a looooong ride... Dr.P's Comments: She is one of my fine hot ass bitches, for exlusive playahs only. That's my car there on the back, made for sweeeeet lovin'. Title: "I've Fallen and I can't get up!" 2 Thumbs Up Mr.White Chocolate's Comments: This sext hoe is lookin at me like she need help. I gotta take out my tools and work on this this girl all night long. Dr.P's comments: Yeah... I gotta bust this nice lady. She could be my private beatch on a beach!! Title: "What the F...!" Mr.White Chocolate's Comments: Even if she waz the last hoe on the world I wouldnt spank this monkey's hairy arss... This biatch has no luck in the pimpin world so she best retire cuase with those shoudler she could be a quarter back on a high school football team! Thats nassstty! Dr.P's Comments: HOLY SHIT!!! It's amazing how can anyone mix in photoshop a woman a man and an ape!!....It's not photoshop? bad luck Crack hoe!!

Aight Yall thas enough! So that was a typical surfin day in the pimp life Hope yall enjoyed... don't hurt urselves! Pimps up! And these fine arss hoes go down where they belong!

Pimpin All Over The World

Let's get this shit started... First off lets introduce the top hoes... I have to admit, I am starting once again in the pimpin business after an abstence due to my compromise with other issues... But your Pimp Daddy is back, and now wit a new side kick who we'll call Dr.P in order to keep his identity a secret. Being down in a country wit hot latinas makes pimpin meaner than ever. There are a variety of bitches to choose from...just lick your pick and conquer her wit your skills... remeber, don't eva hurt ur bitch! Let's start off wit the lovely Miss Mora.... Mora, I met this gal thru work. She's got a sweet voice that gives me the shiver, among other things..lol... but I keep cool and even though at first she was timid and we only spoke about work issues... With time I softened her up and I got her picture... Oh yeah the one problem with dis bitch is that she works in a different office... But I got her to send me a pic of her... (mora is the last one on the right...) My side kick Dr.P give her a thumbs up... I don't think she's at her best in this pick cuase the girl looked mad fine on web cam... she got cat eyes and that voice... she's a hot latina.. half mexican, half hondurian... Next! Next we got Charlotte... Now this sexy petite is very timid... up till now we're still trying to soften her up... Sorry pimps, there no pic of her availible right now but I'm workin on it. This bitch works at my office and she has a sweet stare... Dr.P and I both agree that her best accent are her eyes... she's like a said puppy askin for some pimp lovin... She's got the correct credentials... but she's got to step a little more out of the box... Dr.P and I are on a mission to soften her up and get her screamin our names for more! Third bitch is one we have not met yet but we know that she will be a tough and wild bitch to work on. All I have is her name: Claudia... By the picture all you pimps can percieve her sexy vibes as she moves to the beat, sweatin her moves on the dance floor. Need I say more?! So that's all the bitches I have to present to you now. I said stated, I am re-introducing myself into the pimp life after a long absence. I started off back in the U.S.A and now am testing the pimp power down here in South America... Pimps Up! Hoes Down!

My Life. My Hoes

What up Bitches! This is my mackin' blog dedicated to sharing and expressing my pimpin life with my hoes. Check out the hot girls and freaky stories on how I met em'. For all those sympathizers, don't worry no one is hurt in the making of my Pimp Playground Blog. The characters are real and the story is true. For all those who know what it's like to be a playah, you know where I stand. Theres a special feeling we get as playahs, our bitches give us life and good times. Don't ever hurt your bitch playah. You gotta treat em' with delicassy...it's your bitch m0ther f*cker! Peace out Pimps Up! Hoes Down!