Pimpin fo Dummies 2

Aight this is chapta 2 of "Pimpin fo Dummies"

"So You Got Her Digits…Now What?" "You see her from across the room, leaning over, long hair falling over her shoulders, chest pressed against the mahogany bar, her face lit by the seductive dim of candle light. You order yourself a beer, lean back and occasionally glance over to the un-named target of your beginning to get fuzzy, late-night desire. She sees you too now and you both play “eye-footsie” until you are as hard as the alcohol in your drink. Your not sure how, but you wind up talking, and it goes well, really well. Even though your mind is on two things below chin-level, you manage to fight the urge to stare at them and ask for her number…and she gives it to you…the real number…no 1-800 “sorry you have been rejected and she doesn’t have the balls to tell you” hotline. So you stand there, hot girl’s number locked in your cell as whatever name you think you heard over the blare of hip hop, or whatever name you think you will remember when you wake up in the morning (aka “girl with nice rack”). As you leave the bar, wondering if you closed your tab and keeping a look-out for a pizza place, you applaud yourself for getting her digits, but you wonder to yourself, now what? First and foremost, during the actual phone number “transaction,” always be the one to put the numbers into your phone, not her. She will want to know that you will make an effort to hear her scream her number over excessively loud music and even if you don’t hear it (type in your nickname for her), that you know her name. Say “thank you” as you hit store. She will think you are polite and almost in awe of her, and in time, after the call is made, she will thank you back tenfold. No matter what DO NOT call the next day…even if you believe in love at first sight (which doesn’t exist, only lust at first sight-sorry helpless romantics), you do not call the following day. This 24-hour period is crucial to your chances of hitting the booty lottery and collecting your well deserved winnings. If you call the next day, she will think one of two things, and neither is good. The first is that you are an over-zealous bar-stalker who spends his days calling back average girls who are average enough to scare off with premature “ejac-callation” which benefits no one, is messy and can actually be quite dangerous. The second is that you are a nice guy, and no girl likes a nice guy. The longer you wait to call her, the bigger the asshole you appear to be…so two or three days after gives you an edge without being a total dick and she will think you actually have a life, and even if you don’t, pretend. Don’t let more than three days go by before you dial. After the three day mark, she won’t answer, even if she doesn’t know your number, she won’t answer any unknown calls just in case it’s you, because at that point it’s all about her proving her point…you are too late... When you make the call, you have to use the “no-plan plan.” Think of something that you can invite her to, or something that you can do together, but do not let her know that you thought about this “plan” before calling. Act as if you came up with the genius, well-thought out plan on the spot while talking to her. If it seems too premeditated, you may scare her into thinking you like her too much, or again, that are just too much of a damn nice guy. And if you don’t have a plan, she will think you have no interest in dinner, drinks, even sex (and I am sure that is NOT the case). The “no-plan plan” is the only way to move smoothly from the first meeting to the second, and your only chance to get “nice rack” in the sack. Obviously some girls should come with disclaimers saying “no matter when you call or what you say, I do not put out” so that you don’t waste your time dialing digits that lead to dead ends or prude friends. But 100% of the calls you don’t make, is ass you won’t take…so get her number, make the call when and how you should and take your relationship from Cingular to “plus one." pimpwiz.com note: pimp playground is in no way connected to pimpwiz.com so dat means dem pics are from Pimp Playground Pimpwiz is a PG-13 Site